My opinions, updates on my life, all sorts of "randomness"...

Kenny's funeral was today. An emotional whirlwind. So many people I haven't seen in so long... People that under other circumstances I would have loved to see, too catch up with... But I could barely say hello. I think most people I just hugged through my tears without saying anything...

The funeral was moving. Rabbi Berkun led a wonderful service and delivered such a touching eulogy. As Sue (Kenny's mom) said afterwards, it really captured the essence of Kenny. Cried most of the time, with a couple breaks to stare at the stained-glass windows not really comprehending where I was or that it was all real.

The cemetery afterwards was tough. I somehow managed to end up standing alone, sobbing as they slowly lowered him... Then someone's arm was around me as I cried, then I was holding a shovel letting some dirt fall, then I was hugging Sue... Stayed until he was completely buried. Still didn't (and doesn't) seem real.

Shiva was almost a drastic change in emotion. A little crying, but more smiling. Telling stories about Kenny. Catching up with old friends. Being with one another... It's such an amazing thing, the way Judaism teaches us to morn. The idea of having everyone together while in such an emotional state of mind. No one has to be alone. Not the family, not friends. Everyone looks out for one another...

I've been thinking a lot about people I've lost touch with over the years. People I used to be friends with, that I don't even know where they are now. I don't know when I saw Kenny last before he died, and that's eating me up inside. It should never be so long since you've seen a friend that you can't remember.